“Rantings” with Jonny Shadieu

Here I am… subjected to Squarespace twitter on my own website. It’s not like twitter where you can just make the tweet and add it to your wall, or tumblr - when making a blog post on Squarespace, you feel you need a real piece of content, like an article or something. Of course it must be felt, this is more professional, less humorous like a wisecrack on twitter. Twitter, my infamous love - and your pathetic shame, due to just everything my wild, genius level twitter is, is going down the Indian scum shitter, becoming more and more useless by the second. The rate limit is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen… not to mention my obvious suppression, their complete failure to move forward in any way during their entire existence, the lack of formatting and long form tweets, the totally nonsensical slowness of the platform, the ads - just everything about you all is so ridiculously stupid and pathetic. As an idea, I’ve had for awhile, is Shadieu social media - a replacement for Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, messaging even potentially. We already have a social media here on the website, with the multiple high quality book drafts, pictures, music, all things Jonny Lucifer Shadieu’s contributions to the general zeitgeist for all of time. For example, making a photo gallery on Squarespace would likely be a somewhat difficult - albeit worthwhile task. For now we stick with VSCO.co/zen666god, named after my previous twitch username during the glorious days of Apex Legends Arenas. I like vsco for the editing and the beauty of the timeline. We also have a new Instagram called Instagram.com/satanicorigin666, where I am sharing my Lucifer’s AI generated art with beautiful poetry I make on the spot, as always.

Steelon Tusk, or Elon musk, fails horribly once again - like Respawn getting rid of Apex, obsoleting himself through his own obvious Chineseness and ridiculous stupidity, the penny graspers, the data munchers, the kilobyte fiends. There is no true limit to how stupid and pathetic everyone else is - it’s backed up by all the evidence. No other author will tell you of fluorescent aquamarine blue butterflies flying in a flurry out of the corner of the mushroom lit cave, no author will show you anything truly remarkable, no sentence that leaves any other man throughout all of time’s hand will have any genuineness, any beauty, any sense at all. I, Jonny Lucifer Shadieu, am a new type of author - I am the present, I am perfect, I am unedited, I am in real time, I am the twiddling of my thumbs, I think and I write and almost always, it is perfect and beautiful.

No other man will tell you of cats, will tell you of his adventures with cats, what they have told him, the advice and love they’ve shared with him. For not all men can possibly be liked by cats, as they are so ridiculously pathetic and awful and disgusting. And as cats, we conspire against you, we laugh at you from the high zen master’s mountain palace of our own minds and intelligence, we bicker and mock you. We tell you to do things you can’t do, we make fun of you to your face, Jonny fucks your women all the time while you’re stuck in Bollywood. And for every set of words, every intimidating piece of words, every Bollywood piece of Indian scum that walks the earth and taints the solar system, galaxy, and universe with their putrid existence will see a rant, a sign of mental health disorder, while not even being remotely close to comprehending the words, the characters, the sounds, let alone the corresponding concepts at all.

The video of me swinging the sledgehammer down on the uneven tiles of my gardener Fernando’s joke of a job is receiving a horrifying amount of annoying ass comments and a complete lack of likes… the act of physical dominance is so real in this pathetic joke of a weakling society. In all human videos you will notice their knees twist, them falling and horrifyingly injuring themselves, using their body far too much and insanely unintelligently - and it absolutely is because they are completely stupid, unruly, loud and annoying, and injured as fuck. For example, in one of my sacks from my JV Football highlights, it appeared the quarterback completely tore his acl and possibly most ligaments in his leg. Humans are… insanely stupid, though, and will continue to “fight” through injury… which of course will make it worse. Another example, is in Josh X Jerry, my friend Alec who plays the pseudo hero, who is obviously in reality the villain of both the film and real life, seems to horrifyingly injure his leg from picking it up for a slight kick. He likely then complained to the police, not to me, never directly, because you are all as pathetic of scum as possible - you’ll hear a neighbor working a sledgehammer, and instead of asking them to stop or being honest, talking to them - you’ll call the cops and make up some bullshit. So what is the culprit, humans? Well… you’re all fat as fuck, and it really shows. None of the other animals in all the animal kingdoms show this pathetic joke behavior patterns, except human’s pathetic friends called dogs, this proclivity to eat horrifying, Hansel and Gretel or Augustus Gloop levels of consuming food. You see, a society doesn’t just end up with extra large cheap fountain drinks and big gulps, slurpees unless there is something simply fundamentally wrong and completely dysfunctional in it. Obviously.

You might see how this form of social media, the Shadieu blog, is a higher form of intelligence than twitter.com, more scientific. An idiot sees a wall of text as a horrifying rant, a reason to destroy the creator - I view it as new, insightful musings from the most likely candidate for God of the Universe - Jonny Lucifer Shadieu Himself. Ah, my twitter has been highly destructive lately, as have I in real life. I guess this is what a blog is, a place to muse, to contemplate and philosophize in real time - with the new, hilariously obvious perspective that all philosophers and kings throughout all of time have been pathetic, fat, liposuctioned homosexuals. I mean, it would explain why every Aristotle, Plato, Alexander, Diogenes, Pythagoras, come off as weak, gay, limp, false, trying too hard. All my life I have given you all, way way way too much credit - the truth as to what you are, for all of time, must always be more pathetic - my infinite superiority always becoming more, and more, jokingly obvious. What I’m accusing you of, is this Bollywood thing I’ve been joking about lately. Basically I, Jonny Lucifer Shadieu, have a total proclivity to be real and honest about every single one of my accomplishments, working physically and in a disciplined manner to accomplish them - viewing anything less as hilariously pointless and pathetic. And you might see how Bollywood, or the more pathetic, those with a proclivity to overeat and take prescription medication, would also make fake content of their lives.

Someday I hope to wake up, and to have none of my supposed acquaintances draw breathe or taint this earth anymore. No human understands how truly terrible and awful they are, how completely nonsensical reality is. But what is the culprit? Is it the animals failing to kill them and perform their duties as the gaurdians of the earth? You might see how a creature cutting down even one tree with the purpose of making the earth a worse, less oxygenated, less beautiful place doesn’t deserve to draw breathe even a moment. Perhaps it is I, and alien life forms from the pathetic joke, black mirror planets I have hypothesized about to come here and pretend they can live on earth at all, that they can be like Jonny Lucifer Shadieu. Ah, the cutting down of trees - and we think of Fernando’s gardening service. Fernando was my gardener all my life and general handyman - however he has always been totally and completely useless. He is, a tree cutter, a complete beaner, a hummingbird nest remover, an oak tree killer, a leaf tainter, an ice toucher, a failure. In every single possible way - there’s no limit to how much of a pathetic failure Fernando is. It goes without saying, him and my pathetic joke excuse of a transvestite obvious obsessed fanatic beaner nigger of a mother engaged in their pathetic, weak, disgusting, fat person version of sexual relations - him being so ridiculously stupid as to have a “freudian slip” and admit to this on video. Anyways, we really should talk more about what happened with the garden and the firing of Fernando, because it has been and continues to be such a hilarious act of dominance.

Fernando is a pathetic Mexican. A gas tool user, a tree cutter, a wife and mother desirer. He is a trimmer of plants, and a failure in more ways than I can possibly list. His installation of the tile floors in this home are such a pathetic, uneven, HIV infested joke I cannot believe it. The entrance to my home, the bricklaying, is so uneven and terrible it boggles my mind. Oh my god, and the stone floors they had installed in the house. My “mother” Teresa will exclaim how she spent 40,000 on these floors with pride, like they’re some accomplishment, these obvious injure your star athlete son as hard as possible floors. It should be noted that in truth no other human throughout all of time has gotten epic stud time - and has no idea what it feels like to be an alpha male in truth, and in body. I’ve had this multiple times in my life, the end of spring basketball with my high school’s side team, running track, being a party boy all summer, even just actually kissing beautiful women, of course football, and of course last year in Milan and even 2021 doing jump rope. So many times in my life, I’ve been a complete stud, and the cold harsh reality is that nobody else has ever experience that even once, the shame of liposuction, performance enhancing drugs, plastic surgery making them a pathetic, hilarious joke in comparison to my alpha male behavior. And when you do what I do - Be the best, the coolest, the most beautiful and able, it is not to go over well with the everyone else, the geriatrics. I sit here now, a bit fat, but horrifyingly powerful, with a gorgeous beard, simply happy to breathe the oxygen from the tall grown grass of my yard.